Aside from unpacking my things and eating Pringles and drinking coffee, this is what you've missed so far:
"Oh honey, come here!"
I go to the living room with my coffee to where my Dad is. He's pointing at the television.
"Look, look! They're repaving the walk because a tree uprooted it! Isn't this exciting?"
I end up watching the show with him for a good twenty minutes and learn a lot about digging up roots that are lifting up the cement walk in front of your countryside home. Followed by a helpful guide to visitors of Wisconsin in how to identify the many types of cows you may see while driving down a Wisconsin highway.
I fold laundry while talking to my mom. I fold up a shirt and set it down. She picks up the shirt I just folded, opens it up again and re-folds it.
Grif: Hey, Haley, how was Japan?
Mom: Well, we got lost going to the airport!
Dad: Lin, he asked Haley how Japan was.
Grif: How did you get lost with a GPS?
Mom: Well we got a little turned around near the terminals and which one to take...(continues on)
Never did get to tell him how Japan was.
(Dad lays down and puts newspaper over his face to block out the sun during his nap)
Me: You know, they make eyemasks for exactly this sort of situation.
Dad: I know, I made one. (Pats hand on newspaper)
Me: Hey Mom, now that you have the whole family together again, are you going to start cooking every night like you used to?
Me: Cooking, mom. Do you remember what a stove is?
Mom: ...I...What...? (glances shiftily out window)
Dad: I try to turn the knobs on it once in a while to make sure they still work.
Gizmo (my pet bird) : Tweet tweet, bitches. (No, but in actuality he did start going on a chirping frenzy when I walked in through the door. He is currently twittering and squeaking a little melody out right now. Birds are actually fantastic, social, underrated pets.)
Aaaaand it's not even 11 AM.
It's good to be home.
Update: We just ordered food from Pop's. I'm getting my cheeseburger, fries, and shake. I also plan on gaining 30 pounds. Because America, that's why.